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all my posts are in english. (UK spelling)
I'm not spelling colour wrong, thanks.

 

So many people have been slating me recently, because of this photo.
Especially people who I used to know from secondary school, I even had a girl telling me 'You have an awful figure. You'll never make it as a model.
Now, maybe, in her opinion I have an awful figure, but I've never been 'trying to make it' - I think everywhere is far too saturated with people doing that. It's for my own enjoyment, and if other people enjoy my 'work' too, then bonus.
For a long time I had issues with my body, and loathed the fact that I had breasts. I wanted more than anything to change my body - to have the frame and build of all the skinny self-pity poster boys. It wasn't a gender issue, as such, more a body-shape issue, as I said.
This photo for me is a celebration of the fact that I am a girl. A photo for me.

All I want to acheive out of all this is something I can feel proud of, and I use photography as a way of expressing myself, in way I usually couldn't.

I don't know if I could do it as a job, unless I chose my projects because doing every day, of things I'm are not interested in would definatley ruin my love for photography. Maybe, even kill it.

Bleached my hair.
It's gone very brassy, so I've put some toner on, hoping it will work better now I've bleached it.

Oh I do look wonderful with this Sainbury's bag on my head ;D




Because I have nothing better to do, here's some photos I like.
( here )

my half christmas list, half winter outfit.
I want to gather it all together before it starts to get bitter cold in late December/January
(Although, I highly doubt I'll buy anything from Milanoo, since I've heard really awful reveiws, both on quality and shipping time)

I've wanted a pair of rocking horse shoes for years.
Can anyone suggest anywhere that sell cheap, but decent quality ones?

I'm also not sure about the bloomers.

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I have a kindey infection, but I can't take any time of work because I need the money.
I'm glad to have the time off college though because I can work at home in peace, instead of having to put up with noisy chavs while I just want to read though some books and such. I just wish I coud take about 17 books home with me, and somehow borrow a photocopier too.

And our class managed to get an extension on two of our projects.
It's such a relief. I've been stressing about it for this whole week.
I need to stop leavig things until the last second all the time.
(':

The last few weeks I've been working my ass off to meet my deadlines, which are next week! I'm dreading it!
I've been staying in the Library until close every single night, for the last few days, and I still don't think I've gone into half as much detail as I need to.
We'll see.
I still need to shoot in the studio, and get some film developed.
That's what I'll be doing for the next week or so, so if you think of me, either thinking of me sleeping, or gluing stupidly small bits of paper into my sketchbooks.

I've been sat for the past hour, waiting for the hot water to come on, and it doesn't seem to want to.
I hope the boiler isn't broken.
Especially in this cold!



A drunk photo from Jake's Birthday.
We went for a meal at Pizza hut, and I drank far too much wine during the meal, and couldn't finish my cookie dough.
After we went for shots, which were caramel shots apprently, but they tasted like crap!
It was a cold night, and me and Tom didn't have much money so we left early. I would have liked to have stayed longer, but Rock City was a £5 to get in, and we didn't even have that combinded.
Poor!
(':

 

 

The rave was appalling.
I spent the first 10 minutes climbing of fences and bashing my knees, only to find out I was in the wrong field.
Finally got there, after losing on of my beloved lace gloves, and to find I only knew about 10 people there.
I tried to to be judgmental over the people there - honestly, tried my god damned hardest - but there were so many chavs.
Now, I don't have a problem people taking drugs around me - but when you get dealers selling speed to a 14 yr-old then you have problems.

I spent most of the night dancing to some god awful music, and listening (trying to stop my ears bleeding in the process) to some fools thinking they could rap.

Then, the police showed, searching people for drugs and so I left, slipping back over the gates and walked up to the bus stop.
One of the worst nights of my life, seriously.
It had it's funny moments, but when you get girls so drunk they can't stand and guys trying to take advantage of this - well I defiantly draw the line.
It's disgusting!

I was so glad to curl up in bed.




 

my outfit, minus gloves, and without showing my boots.
I need a shutter release cable - apologies about the focus, but I just wanted you guys to see that god of a coat.

 

 

This scared this shit out of me when I first saw it, but then I was reminded of the tiny cut from Inglorious Basterds where I can't remember his name is banging his interpreter, who has awesome fashion sense might I add, and it ruined it. )':

- - -



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x College has started and I'm really enjoying it. We only have a small class (of around 11 people, which I'm sure will drop) and everyone is still at the getting to know one another stage.
( more life stuff )



 

I finally got around to editing some of the photos I took with Aeryn, from exploring the stables.
I still have another set to go through, which is a pin-up shoot we did at her flat about a week after-wards.
She's moved to Oxford now for university ):



( ++ )

I went for my college enrollment today and it was total chaos. Nothing was organised. All these different courses were all stuffed into the library, construction, travel and tourism (when was that a course?), and all the art courses - none of the tutors knew which courses had to fill in which forms, and everyone had to sit in a poxy IT room to be told your under 19/this is your first level 3 course so we can't charge you for the course - all one at a fucking time!
Something that should have taken about twenty minutes - tops! - ended up with me sat down waiting around for almost two hours!
I have my induction next wednesday and thursday - let's hope to God it was slightly more organized than today!
 

some outakes from today!
we ended up shooting in a different location than originally planned but I loved it all the same!

Thomas, after his exploration of the building, deduced the building was once a sabb dealer, an indian takeaway/resturant, a washing machine repairer and horse stables. Though I think the last one is fairly obvoius, since the building was named the stables.

The only problem was that to get to the higher floors where it was light and you could see without the aid of a torch, you had to trudge through some slimey carpet covered in I don't even want to know what. At one point, this slimey brown/green mess was almost an inch thick and smelt like well...rotting, which I can only imagine the carpet was.



( [+2] )

don't look if you don't like dead animals, though it's not that noticeable